One to feature that has been continuously stated whenever revealing features of the best upcoming connection is actually good “husband” who was simply economically secure. Lady expressed some other viewpoints on which it noticed it designed to be financially secure. Specific ladies chatted about its mate while the only seller toward nearest and dearest although some demonstrated its companion while the contributing to the family profit. More than once, girls reported that they wanted partners which you’ll “allow datingmentor.org/over-50-dating/ for us.” Female were not specific concerning style of business otherwise field one their ideal companion will have, however, have been precise that jobs must provide “adequate to pay their expense otherwise whatever they you prefer in daily life.” Several other new member demonstrated their finest partner a someone who “…are unable to owe we money after which you happen to be having fun with my currency to pay them right back; zero you have to be financially stable, have a great household, a beneficial work, a decent work…” Girls along with talked about the mate are separate rather than in need of so you can rely on them having anything. That it quote captures such attitude: “I’d would like them to be successful, particularly somebody who might be able to feel separate, particular. They will stand on their own a couple of legs if i wasn’t doing.”
Objective dependent
For the even more in order to are financially secure, people wanted a future spouse who was “goal-founded.” Although they don’t give certain information about just what this type of desires might be, people conformed you to definitely their most readily useful companion create “have to be motivated to do something making use of their lifestyle. They cannot take a seat on your butt throughout the lives and you can would nothing. Which is an enormous problem.” Several other girl discussed they by doing this, “Basically have my life together while you should never, you must wade, … I just require anyone who has their lifestyle together with her, who knows what they need, what they’re undertaking … you just have to have your head proper; you need to have good at once your shoulders.” While the various other example, you to girl demonstrated the next partner on these words: “Your gotta possess prospective, you gotta currently have one thing going on which have yourself as if We have anything happening which have me, I am not likely to correspond with some one that’s carrying out some thing faster. So that you actually have having one thing opting for on your own one will actually make me actually have a description to speak to you.”
Conversation
Ladies considering considerate and you will expressive comments about their relationships opinions. Whenever considering the possible opportunity to discuss the hopes and you may wishes for current and you will upcoming relationship, women considering positive depictions off friendship and you will wedding which have an appropriate companion. Which portrayal can be a bit weighed against far existing search and that too frequently depicts Ebony people given that susceptible to your risk wedding and you will unhealthy behavior (Sullivan, Childs, & O’Connell, 2010). Pointers gleaned from the interview in ways dispels the notion that every African american ladies are unaware of fit relationship functions (Raiford et al., 2007). Women contained in this sample revealed its most useful dating using terms you to represent confident attitudes from adolescent most recent and you will upcoming relationships.
Ideal Relationship Relationships into the Highschool
Similarities and you will differences have been both evident out of Dark colored girls’ narratives on an excellent dating relationship, today plus the future. Numerous themes came up from their dysfunction of the most readily useful dating throughout senior high school: (1) temporariness out-of high-school dating, (2) with someone which common comparable education and you can job agreements, and you may (3) need for family within the distinguishing an excellent relationship. Other layouts emerged within description of your own most readily useful future relationship: (1) interest in relationships, (2) economic balance, and you can (3) requirements mainly based. Likewise, in both its characterization of your top relationships throughout the highschool and in the near future, woman talked about a desire for ‘most readily useful friend’ characteristics such esteem, faith, and you may trustworthiness. It’s promising to hear that teenage Ebony women lay worth throughout these attributes and you may positively search him or her in their close relationship.